Pluto in Scorpio

First of all, I’m not a fatalist. I do not believe that just because my Aars is in Aries I am doomed to be impulsive or express my anger like a flash in a pan – there, and then gone. I do not believe that having jupiter in Libra means that I am fated to expand through justice and balanced relationships. I do not believe that having my Venus in Cancer means that I’m fated to be an emotional lover. Yes, I am these things.

But look at the the keywords here: “fated” and “doomed”.

To what extent does free will play into all of this?

My free will tells me that I can create any experience and fulfill any desire that’s true and in my heart, and that I am never “fated” to one path or another.

I picture it like a side-scrolling video game, picture old school Super Mario Bros. for instance. There are a couple levels in which the screen scrolls at a certain speed – this is the passage of time; the pace of life. No matter how much free will we exert, it is impossible to change this motion of time. It is a universal constant, much like the screen scroll on some Super Mario Bros levels. If you try to fight it and go the other direction, you just get pushed along anyways and end up in hot lava.

Once we accept the constant pacing of life – and it does have its own rhythm – we can more fully enjoy the time and experience that we have here. One of my favorite questions we can ask ourselves in Astrology is: “How can I best understand myself and others with this tool?”

Now, let’s get to the crux of this blogular discourse:

Pluto in Scorpio – Just because my Pluto is in Scorpio doesn’t mean that I am fated to experience – and heal – loss, abandonment, and betrayal. But I have, and I do.

My experience validates the points postulated by an objective interpretation of my natal birth chart. This, however, does NOT mean that every astrological interpretation is true. I must, by my nature, question things and ascertain the truth for myself.

But this Pluto in Scorpio stuff – it can be really harsh.

My experience of loss, betrayal, and abandonment went like this: My parents started having problems with each other very early on in their marriage, but their religion – Orthodox Christianity – would not allow them to divorce. I’m sure they felt trapped, bound, and miserable! I came along four years into their marriage. My Father’s own abandonment issues were being triggered and my mother’s issues of self-worth and lovability played off each other in very unhealthy ways. So often, I, as the middle child – a peacemaker – would act as a go between for their arguments, sometimes unwittingly. I lost much of my childhood because I had to spend much of my time caretaking my parents’ own unresolved issues. I was abandoned emotionally because neither parent could offer me the real nourishment  I needed from a place their own emotional wholeness  – neither of their love tanks were full enough to give me the experience of unconditional love. I experienced betrayal because my mother would turn to me for masculine energy, even though i was still a boy. This occurred in such away where I was unable to process it in my boyhood mind in a meaningful way, but i think my subconscious assumption was that my father was jealous of the attention that my mother gave me. Ugh! 

So, if this post is going too deep for you – that’s the Pluto in Scorpio nature – we go deep! It’s because we are healing deep – Pluto-related issues, personally and generationally!

A Generational Aspect

Anyone born 1983-1995 has this aspect in their chart. It’s a generational aspect, given the long journey that pluto takes through the sky in the across the constellation of Scorpio (from our point of view). What this means is that we as a generation have the opportunity to experience loss, abandonment, and betrayal, and to HEAL it. It’s no small task, to be sure. It can take a lifetime, maybe more (if you believe in that sort of thing). But we have to at least try. If you feel “doomed” or “fated” to experience this type of loss, then you must ask yourself if you are participating in victim thinking. Someone who experiences loss, betrayal, and abandonment can very easily become a victim to these experiences, but it doesn’t have to be that way. You can build your power, your self-confidence, and your willingness to deal with the emotional and personal consequences of this burden.

Of course, it’s a burden. Burdens are difficult, often heavy experiences. But burdens make us STRONG. When we shoulder something for so long, our muscles adapt and we can handle similar loads more easily.

If you are a Pluto in Scorpio baby (like me) and you need a place to start the healing process,

Begin here:

– Awareness. We often put much time, effort, and money into medicating away the pain that we experienced as children. SImply getting to the point of acknowledging that loss, abandonment, and/or betrayal happens is the first step.

– Acceptance. Learning to be ok with not being ok – and furthermore, finding people that are okay with you not being ok. The “good vibes only” culture?  They have positive intentions but are missing the point: we are human beings and need to experience the whole spectrum of life – good, bad, and ugly. This does not mean that you shouldn’t carefully choose you words and thoughts. It just means that we as spiritual seekers can get spiritually or emotionally constipated if we have an erroneous belief that “negative” emotions and experiences such as fear, or loss, or betrayal should not “be there”. If it’s there, and it needs to come out (You’ll know), then let it out either by yourself or around safe people that won’t judge you for being human and having emotions.

– Resolve. Make a resolution to heal these aspects of yourself. It’s not going to be easy, but it will totally be worth it. You are a child of god – or the universe – or the big weenie in the sky, and so to do you deserve to be happy and whole. Our hurts can give us tremendous power when we exercise our ability to heal and our resolve to make a commitment to healing. Make a commitment to do whatever it takes to heal these aspects of ourselves so we can teach others how to do so as well. Heal yourself, heal the planet.

Astrology exists. and OF COURSE it’s a pseudo science. Science is a proven method of understanding our known universe – why would we change it? But astrology can provide a very poignant mirror for self reflection into the aspects of life that are more emotional – more subjective – and sometimes, more meaningful.

UNtil next time,
Tim(e)(o)