Conscious Life

A Blog on Personal Development for Awaken(ed/ing) Souls – by Tim Stanek

21 Day Yoga Challenge: Day 20 (Residue)

Elizabeth Heeran’s class at Elements reminded me of something important. She used a sanskrit term that roughly translated to “residue” (I can’t remember the sanskrit term at the moment though). The residue!

In this case, after going through several vinyasa sequences, the “residue” of the practice is the feelings in the body after the hard work is out of the way. Not quite Savasana, the ending (which, again, I wished went on longer than it did!), but the preparation for the ending. Like Autumn, preparing for winter.

We’ve completed the summer months now, and our time with the sun is over. We played, sweated, and enjoyed being seen. Now, with the autumnal equinox happening tomorrow, we are at a turning point. It is time to enjoy the residue of the summer.

Let’s take time to appreciate everything we’ve done for ourselves and others. Let’s appreciate the latent echo of our actions. The residue. The afterglow!

“Afterglow” was the first free association that I made when Elizabeth mentioned the term. It reminded me of a song that I wrote when I was living with an ex in that same neighborhood: Cooper Young.

>>I just played that song for the first time in over 3 years, and the “B” section (like the bridge of the song) came out! It’s interesting how a memorable song will flow out, even if it’s been out of my immediate memory. Lennon and McCartney, the Beatles songwriting duo, used to judge the effectiveness of a song they wrote by how easily they could recall it the day after. If I can recall this song years after I last played it, then it’s a good song for me!

Levels
P – 7

M – 7
E -8

Emotional level is 8 because I’m more quickly and easily feeling my emotions. It’s phenomenal. It’s not easy, but I am at a point where I much prefer it to the numbness I was experiencing before the 21 day yoga challenge.

T
After Cooper Young Fest last weekend I went back to a friends house and enjoyed some adult beverages (yes, it was quite enjoyable. Remember how I mentioned that I wanted to stop hanging out with drinkers so much? No judgement. But once a week seems to be totally reasonable to me, where I am right now.)

Anyways, I met a lady named “T”. I saw her energy – like a warm light – and became interested in talking with her. I picked up my screwdriver and plopped down next to her on the couch. Her vibe was refined but accessible, and I knew she was garrulous because she complimented both me and my friend Jimmie as we walked through the door (two good looking dudes with man buns lol).

After talking for a bit it became apparent that we were going to have a great conversation. the energy exchange was fluid and enjoyable, and I began to open up. I shared where I was with my dating relationships and she seemed intrigued that I’m totally open and honest with the people I date, to the point where I may have missed out on some physical connections what required me to be exclusive. It just doesn’t occur to me to chase these types of connections anymore because personal authenticity has become not just a habit, but a must. I gauge the level of personal authenticity with my emotions, and since I’m feeling and expressing my emotions more quickly now, I am able to become more aware of which actions and relationships reinforce these qualities, so If I were to engage with someone under the false pretenses that I was planning on being exclusive with them, I would feel totally out of character. I want people with whom I resonate.

T mentioned that many men simply don’t do this. She found out that someone close to her, who was married for some time, recently got caught taking another woman with him on a vacation cruise. This story made me appreciate the actions that I take for my own personal integrity, including total honesty. This is challenging because sometimes I feel like it comes off as awkward. In truth, I do feel awkward sometimes when I’m revealing my poly dating choices. But it’s me. It’s ok because I like myself and I like where i am, even though it can be frustrating.

I see it as a learning experience. Currently, I don’t feel satisfied with my dating life even though I’ve experienced a considerable amount of success recently, compared to the last year when I barely dated at all. The clearer i become, and the clearer that I broadcast that which I am, the easier it will be for people who really dig my vibe to find me.

I’m excited! Who knows what the future holds. Whatever happens, happens. But I will say this: several years ago, it was so difficult for me to see into the true nature of who I was. Had I been able to travel back to my past self, circumstances and beliefs would have dictated that any insight from now would fall on dull ears. In order to truly be effective, i would have to address my past self with the courtesy of adapting my past self’s worldview.

I would say something like this: “Hey, don’t worry so much. It’s all going to work out in the end.”

Which is what most people say who achieve any level of success in their lives. It’s wonderful to feel like I’m at a place where I feel successful. My mind is right (or, I’m accepting my innate wonky nature. Same thing). My finances are in order. My dating is fun, and I’m learning a lot.

I appreciate all of you reading, and hope that you can get something out of it. Please reach out and let me know what you like and what you’d like to see me blog about next time.

I sincerely appreciate all the love that I receive simply by shining my light.

Shining your light

If you feel like you’re not shining your light, I encourage you to do so. Sometimes in abusing situations shining your light can cause pain, like it did for me. I had to teach my body (which stores information) that shining my light isn’t going to result in pain. OR, perhaps more importantly, if it does, that that the resulting joy of shining my light will be stronger than the pain. This takes some faith and perseverance, and is perhaps the mark of a spiritual warrior. It’s not a strength of body, necessarily, although physical strength can teach us about other strengths. It’s a strength of the spirit – to be oneself truly, fully, and not GAF about the haters.

I’ve enjoyed writing today. Until next time, Peace.

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21 Day Yoga Challenge: Day 19 (Blue Plate Special with Michelle)

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21 Day Yoga Challenge: Day 21 (Lessons)

2 Comments

  1. Trenivius

    I truly enjoyed your honesty and would like to thank you for sharing your light and inspiring others to do the same. Your energy is so positive. I look forward to reading your future blogs.

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